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What size do i need to remove the spark plugs? and how the hell can i get them out?

You need a deep well socket with rubber insert and a 6'' extension. Go to your local auto parts store they carry them. Buy the plugs there too, take one out and find out what size it needs.
Someone will chime in what size it is. Pull out spark plug wires and go to town on the plugs. Remember to gap the plugs to speck which is .032 on the 2.0. Put a dab of antiseize around the threads and either torque them down which is like 16 ft lbs or tighten em a quarter turn or so after you feel them get snug. Really easy.

5/8" spark-plug socket. I use that and a long and short extension to get me well over the valve cover/ignition coil.

Sometimes a pair of needle nose pliars will fit in the tube.

Also, something else that should work is a standard 5/8" deep socket to loosen the spark plug and then a piece of 3/8" hose to unscrew it and pull it out of the tube.

Thanks a lot guys. Knew how to do the rest just didn't know quite how to get them out.