Post
by Diablo0 » Thu Nov 17, 2005 2:51 pm
HAHAH.. nice... I got a few here at work...
An Iowa State Trooper pulled a car over on I-80 near Des Moines.
When the Trooper asked the driver why he was speeding, the driver
answered that he was a juggler and he was on his way to Omaha to do
a show that night at the Shrine Circus and didn't want to be late.
The Trooper told the driver he was fascinated by juggling, and if
the driver would do a little juggling for him that he wouldn't give
him a ticket. The driver told the Trooper that he had sent all of
his equipment on ahead and didn't have anything to juggle.
The Trooper told him that he had some flares in the trunk of his
patrol car and asked if he could juggle them. The juggler said that
he could, so the Trooper got three flares, lit them and handed them
to the juggler.
While the juggler was doing his act, a car pulled in behind the
patrol car, and a drunk got out. He watched the performance
briefly, then went over to the patrol car, opened the rear door and
got in.
The Trooper observed him doing this and went over to the patrol
car, opened the back door and asked the drunk what he thought he
was doing.
The drunk replied, "You might as well take my ass to jail, cause
there's no way in hell I can pass that test."
And...
Last year I replaced all the windows in my house
with those expensive double-pane energy-efficient kind.
But this week I got a call from the contractor who installed
them, complaining that his work had been completed a whole
year ago, and I had yet to pay for them.
Boy oh boy, did we go around!! Just because I'm blonde
doesn't mean that I am automatically stupid.
I proceeded to tell him just what his fast talking sales guy
had told me last year: namely, that in one year the windows
would pay for themselves.
There was silence on the other end of the line, so I
just hung up... and I have not heard back.
Guess I won that stupid argument!
And....
The Gay Man & The Black Man
At the end of a tiny deserted bar in downtown Atlanta sat a huge
black man. He was having a few beers, when a short, well dressed, and
obviously gay man walked in and sat beside him.
After three or four beers, the gay man got the courage to say a few
words to the big black man.
Leaning over towards him, he whispered, "Do you want a blow job?"
At this, the massive black man leaped up with fire in his eyes, and
smacked the shit out of the gay man, knocking him swiftly off his stool.
He proceeded to beat him all the way out of the bar, before leaving him
bruised and battered in the parking lot, and returning to his seat.
Amazed, the bartender quickly brought over another beer to the black
man, and said, "I've never seen you react like that. What did he say to
you?"
"I don't know," the black man replied. "Something about a job."
-Jason
Black '02 Neon R/T |
White '02 Neon R/T -
SRT-4 Engine Swap
^^^ no, that isn't what I look like haha
Try not to become a man of success but rather to become a man of value. - Albert Einstein
that ones good
Sam-I-Am