Map of Metal

bigbird · Post by **bigbird** » Sun Dec 12, 2010 10:26 am

very cool
http://mapofmetal.com/#/home
shows all the breakdowns and sub categories of metal.

gtxtreme19 · Post by **gtxtreme19** » Sun Dec 12, 2010 10:43 am

I have to say that this is the most far off thing ive ever read, what the hell are "Punk" or "grunge" doing on a metal map?

FAIL

MyNeonSaysHi · Post by **MyNeonSaysHi** » Sun Dec 12, 2010 11:57 am

Stopped loading at 4%.

LilSparkPlug · Post by **LilSparkPlug** » Sun Dec 12, 2010 12:51 pm

I fail I thought it meant types of metal...not metal music

Marcel · Post by **Marcel** » Sun Dec 12, 2010 1:50 pm

a bit overcomplete: why is punk and grunge in there?

anyway, i like the good ol' text based version better

HEAVY METAL: The protagonist arrives on a Harley Davidson, kills the dragon, drinks some beers and fucks the princess

GRIND METAL: The protagonist arrives, screams something completely undecipherable for about 2 minutes and then leaves...

POWER METAL: The protagonist arrives riding a white unicorn, escapes from the dragon, saves the princess and they make love in an enchanted forest

THRASH METAL: The protagonist arrives, fights the dragon, saves the princes and fucks her....... easy and quick

FOLK METAL: The protagonist arrives with some friends playing accordions, violins, flutes and many more weird instruments, the dragon falls asleep (from all the dancing) protagonist leaves without the princess

VIKING METAL: The protagonist arrives in a ship, kills the dragon with his migthy axe, cooks and eats it, rapes the princess to death, steals the castle and burns the place before he leaves

DEATH METAL: The protagonist arrives, kills the dragon, fucks the princess and kills her, then leaves

BLACK METAL: The protagonist arrives at midnight, kills the dragon and impales it in the front of the castle.....then sodomizes the princess, drinks her blood in a ritual before killing her.....then he impales the deflowered princess

GORE METAL: The protagonist arrives, kills the dragon and spreads his guts in the front of the castle, fucks the princess and kills her....then he fucks again her dead body, slashes her belly open and eats her guts, fucks the carcass for the third time, burns the corpse and fucks it for the last time

DOOM METAL: The protagonist arrives, sees the size of the dragon and thinks that he never could beat him, gets depressed and commits suicide....the dragon eats his body and the princess as well

PROGRESSIVE METAL: The protagonist arrives with a guitar and plays a solo for 26 minutes, the dragon kills himself out of boredom, the protagonist arrives to the princess' bedroom, plays another solo with all the techniques learned in the last year of the conservatory... the princess escapes, and is now looking for the "HEAVY METAL" protagonist

GLAM METAL: The protagonist arrives, the dragon laughs at the guy's appearance and lets him enter, he steals the princess' make-up and tries to paint the castle in a beautiful pink color

INDUSTRIAL METAL: The protagonist arrives wearing greasy overcoat, makes an obscene gestures towards dragon, and gets escorted out of fairy tale land by security guards.

bigbird · Post by **bigbird** » Sun Dec 12, 2010 10:31 pm

LilSparkPlug wrote:I fail I thought it meant types of metal...not metal music

LOL...I probably would have also!

gtxtreme19 wrote:I have to say that this is the most far off thing ive ever read, what the hell are "Punk" or "grunge" doing on a metal map?

FAIL

I really enjoyed it. Just reading about how each genre influenced others was interesting even how punk was an influence to bands that came later. I agree grunge is not metal, but it does show it's roots in hard rock as well!

I thought you guys would enjoy this, I know I did even though it isn't perfect!

INVUJerry · Post by **INVUJerry** » Sun Dec 12, 2010 10:58 pm

Marcel, that is perfect. I like the GRIND explanation.

And this is pretty neat too, I never knew about Dark Ambient.

The only Meshuggah song in Djent is 15 years old! WTF?!

I really like most of the "deathcore" bands he has on there. My old band played with Acacia Strain a few years ago.

LilSparkPlug · Post by **LilSparkPlug** » Mon Dec 13, 2010 10:34 am

bigbird wrote:
LilSparkPlug wrote:I fail I thought it meant types of metal...not metal music
LOL...I probably would have also!

I now feel much better

NeonGurl · Post by **NeonGurl** » Wed Dec 15, 2010 12:23 pm

Pretty awesome. My boyfriend is really into metal. I'm mostly into bands like Fall Out Boy and the Neon Trees, but some of the music on there was good. I like the older metal, and I really liked some of the goth stuff. Thanks for the link.

Marcel · Post by **Marcel** » Wed Dec 15, 2010 12:50 pm

still it's a shame they forgot lounge...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=u53_Xz-TE94&t=0m38s