Roommates? wtf?
Roommates? wtf?
Ok, So. I moved out on my own, kinda. I'm bunked up with 2 other roommates, my friend since Jr. High and his girlfriend/fiance. Now, It's been a struggle to get this far, about a month in, and there are things that have been bothering me about them. not that they're weird or doing anything illegal, it's just that boundaries are being crossed that shouldn't be. In my opinion. Like food, toiletries, etc.
What do I mean, exactly? Well, I moved in under the impression that we would look out for one another as they have said this, turns out this isn't so much the case and a mere month in I am having thoughts that living with my father, again, would be better then with these two.
Ok, let me actually explain. It started off ok, except when they made something I got the 'left overs' not really complaining because, well, it was nice enough for them to give me anything, I guess. But when things started to get tight on my end and I barely could afford food because I had to make rent I went hungry because I lost hours because of Superstorm Sandy. the only saving grace was thanksgiving at my aunt's and the LOADS of food she sends me home with. This issue was further amplified by the fact that when I brought home food to make it through payday and it was picked at by them to the point my food budget for just myself became myself and 2 others. So, I put my foot down, told them this is my food and if they want anything they can ask me because I can't afford to buy food for them too. I separated my food and things have been a little better, but my food is still picked at. not only that but while on my way home from work they called me and asked me to pick up a bottle of alcohol, told them I don't have money and was promised that they'd pay be back, they never did and when it came time to pay rent I didn't have enough and took what they owed me from the bottle (about $16 from a $25 bottle) out of the rent, they made a big deal over this after I told them I couldn't buy it and make rent at the same time.
So, ok, food is one thing, but when I come home from work, the one thing I want to do is get on MY computer. I told them they can use it as long as they were off of it when I walked in that door and they didn't check their email (facebook is fine) because I didn't want to have to deal with viruses. Mind you, the computer is in my room and I pay for the internet. Well, these rules were promptly broken as they didn't get off when I walked in my room and I sat on my bed waiting for them to get off being told 'one minute' and finding they were still logged into their email when I went to check mine. Needless to say, I now have a password lock on my computer.
Now, my final point and this is the one that really steamed me, but I came home from work and needed to use the bathroom but there was no TP, so I ask my roommate "do we have any TP?" they both say no, now I know this is BS for three reasons. one being I seen their 'stash' and took a roll from it when there was none in the bathroom one day figuring it just ran out. Two, there's a female in the house, they're never without TP and if they were, it'd be a huge problem that everyone from here to Timbuktu would know. And three, I found a roll hidden under the sink when I just couldn't hold it any more. Needless to say, I didn't use it and went the shower route. Really nice, right?
What it comes down to is I feel like I'm being used. Now, I know I haven't been a 100% joy to live with either, but shit, to eat my food when I don't touch theirs, use my computer, breaking the rules I set up and denying me TP when I really needed it isn't right and every time I try to talk to them they make me seem like the asshole.
Sorry, I needed to vent and I need opinions on this. What should I do?
What do I mean, exactly? Well, I moved in under the impression that we would look out for one another as they have said this, turns out this isn't so much the case and a mere month in I am having thoughts that living with my father, again, would be better then with these two.
Ok, let me actually explain. It started off ok, except when they made something I got the 'left overs' not really complaining because, well, it was nice enough for them to give me anything, I guess. But when things started to get tight on my end and I barely could afford food because I had to make rent I went hungry because I lost hours because of Superstorm Sandy. the only saving grace was thanksgiving at my aunt's and the LOADS of food she sends me home with. This issue was further amplified by the fact that when I brought home food to make it through payday and it was picked at by them to the point my food budget for just myself became myself and 2 others. So, I put my foot down, told them this is my food and if they want anything they can ask me because I can't afford to buy food for them too. I separated my food and things have been a little better, but my food is still picked at. not only that but while on my way home from work they called me and asked me to pick up a bottle of alcohol, told them I don't have money and was promised that they'd pay be back, they never did and when it came time to pay rent I didn't have enough and took what they owed me from the bottle (about $16 from a $25 bottle) out of the rent, they made a big deal over this after I told them I couldn't buy it and make rent at the same time.
So, ok, food is one thing, but when I come home from work, the one thing I want to do is get on MY computer. I told them they can use it as long as they were off of it when I walked in that door and they didn't check their email (facebook is fine) because I didn't want to have to deal with viruses. Mind you, the computer is in my room and I pay for the internet. Well, these rules were promptly broken as they didn't get off when I walked in my room and I sat on my bed waiting for them to get off being told 'one minute' and finding they were still logged into their email when I went to check mine. Needless to say, I now have a password lock on my computer.
Now, my final point and this is the one that really steamed me, but I came home from work and needed to use the bathroom but there was no TP, so I ask my roommate "do we have any TP?" they both say no, now I know this is BS for three reasons. one being I seen their 'stash' and took a roll from it when there was none in the bathroom one day figuring it just ran out. Two, there's a female in the house, they're never without TP and if they were, it'd be a huge problem that everyone from here to Timbuktu would know. And three, I found a roll hidden under the sink when I just couldn't hold it any more. Needless to say, I didn't use it and went the shower route. Really nice, right?
What it comes down to is I feel like I'm being used. Now, I know I haven't been a 100% joy to live with either, but shit, to eat my food when I don't touch theirs, use my computer, breaking the rules I set up and denying me TP when I really needed it isn't right and every time I try to talk to them they make me seem like the asshole.
Sorry, I needed to vent and I need opinions on this. What should I do?
I'd say it's time to move.
Either that or, you didn't make sure they understood what you meant when you put your foot down.
There's two of them and one of you. There's no reason for them to have to come to you for extra money or necessities or anything else for that matter.
Tell them to get their shit together or just pack your shit and leave...
...let them know you're leaving first though. No extra drama needed.
Either that or, you didn't make sure they understood what you meant when you put your foot down.
There's two of them and one of you. There's no reason for them to have to come to you for extra money or necessities or anything else for that matter.
Tell them to get their shit together or just pack your shit and leave...
...let them know you're leaving first though. No extra drama needed.
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They might see you as the asshole for locking your PC and telling them to leave your food alone.... so not sharing the TP could of been the same to them for you. They did share their food in the beginning so maybe they think it is okay to have some of yours. I am not agreeing with what they are doing is right. I would say I am backing you completely and I also think they are being children. Move back in with your father if it does not get settled. No point in trying to fight something that is only going to get worse as time goes on. Let them know what your thinking. Point out the TP stash and start WWIII.
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Thing is, I asked if I could have some food when they cooked dinner, they didn't hand it to me without me asking first. I expected the same courtesy when it came to my food. Also, I told them the rules of the computer and they broke them so they pay the consequences of having to ask me to get on if they want on it. They have access to it, they just never ask at this point, except for a few odd times. I basically let them on when I'm not on it and in the middle of something and only if it's important. I mean, the rig is valued at over $1700 (I didn't pay but 1/2 of that, but still)freelancer1988 wrote:They might see you as the asshole for locking your PC and telling them to leave your food alone.... so not sharing the TP could of been the same to them for you. They did share their food in the beginning so maybe they think it is okay to have some of yours. I am not agreeing with what they are doing is right. I would say I am backing you completely and I also think they are being children. Move back in with your father if it does not get settled. No point in trying to fight something that is only going to get worse as time goes on. Let them know what your thinking. Point out the TP stash and start WWIII.
if you all cant learn to share, and i mean everything (cept the woman of course ) then i'd say move out. if you're living together you cant have mine and yours, it just doesnt work very well. sharing in moderation also comes to mind, you cant hoard everything, just take what you need and move on. i'm not necessarily directing this towards you, i'm talking about your roomate as well. Good luck
Justin
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Seems like dumb problems. Sit down with them and talk over these things? They should know your situation, but if not, explain it to them. If that doesn't work then time to go somewhere else.
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TL;DR: tried substituting TP with a shower??????
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When it comes to roomies, you either do things together or seperate ie; shopping, internet, cable, etc etc etc. I would move out, it sounds like trust is an issue. If you can't trust each other than what can you do?
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Re: Roommates? wtf?
What I really wanted to know is... what are you waiting for them to get off of? The bed, or did you buy a new computer chair after that fiasco?Kelevra wrote: Well, these rules were promptly broken as they didn't get off when I walked in my room and I sat on my bed waiting for them to get off being told 'one minute' and finding they were still logged into their email when I went to check mine.
Justin
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!!!
The chair incident
Serious question, is the girl roommate hot?? Got any pictures?
The chair incident
Serious question, is the girl roommate hot?? Got any pictures?
occasional demons wrote:So maybe a FuzzyDanteHagan sammich might just beat a FuzzyHagan.
Danteneon wrote:My advice is to fight those urges and enjoy the fact that you have both X and Y chromosomes. And an SRT. And your hand. You don't need a girl.
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Oh I'm sorry
I will sit here and watch you guys work
I will sit here and watch you guys work
occasional demons wrote:So maybe a FuzzyDanteHagan sammich might just beat a FuzzyHagan.
Danteneon wrote:My advice is to fight those urges and enjoy the fact that you have both X and Y chromosomes. And an SRT. And your hand. You don't need a girl.
Keep in mind, this is an off-topic thread. There are no rules against random posts so long as they don't go too far.Kelevra wrote:While I appreciate the 'comic relief' It's a serious matter. Please don't dick off in the thread. Thanks!
Just sayin.
If I could just figure out how to meld the Outback and the Neon into one car...
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Did you see what I did in my last post???
"I will sit here and watch you work"
(2 years ago at Carlisle)
"I will sit here and watch you work"
(2 years ago at Carlisle)
occasional demons wrote:So maybe a FuzzyDanteHagan sammich might just beat a FuzzyHagan.
Danteneon wrote:My advice is to fight those urges and enjoy the fact that you have both X and Y chromosomes. And an SRT. And your hand. You don't need a girl.
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Looks like you all don't really like each other, and you don't have enough money to really survive on your own. I'd move back home.
So many neons so little time.
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- sidepipe87
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I went through a very similar situation, but I was paying rent to live with my (now ex) boyfriend and his family. We had a mini-fridge in our room, and everything in that room was mine (the full bed, tv stand, fridge, mirror, other stuff) minus the tv. They came in and lounged around in there, and took food from the fridge, used my laptop without asking. I never said anything (except to my boyfriend who I should have known wouldn't have said anything to them). I regret to tell you it ultimately got worse, they broke my stuff (laptop three times) and didn't pay for it, and the buffoon still has my bed.
I agree with the people saying confront them and/or move out.
I agree with the people saying confront them and/or move out.
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^^ Yes I do
Anyways, I too have been thru something not so similar, except my roommate lost her job and had no money to pay rent. I told her for about three months to go out and look, but she had more important things to do... like World of Warcraft..... I of course paid the difference... Ugh.
Long story short, I kicked her out and she moved back with her parents. She did understand and we are still friends to this day.
You do not sound like you can kick anyone out, so maybe moving on would be best. Don't take any offense to my earlier post, but I do have a question...
What kind of specs are you running on a $1,700 computer sir? Mine is just under that.
Anyways, I too have been thru something not so similar, except my roommate lost her job and had no money to pay rent. I told her for about three months to go out and look, but she had more important things to do... like World of Warcraft..... I of course paid the difference... Ugh.
Long story short, I kicked her out and she moved back with her parents. She did understand and we are still friends to this day.
You do not sound like you can kick anyone out, so maybe moving on would be best. Don't take any offense to my earlier post, but I do have a question...
What kind of specs are you running on a $1,700 computer sir? Mine is just under that.
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heyybaker wrote: and the buffoon still has my bed.
I know they aren't cheap, but would you really want it back?
Bill
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2000 Neon MTX swap with '02 R/T PCMOlha Koba, a psychologist in Kyiv, said that “anger and hate in this situation is a normal reaction and important to validate.” But it is important to channel it into something useful, she said, such as making incendiary bombs out of empty bottles.
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